Orphan Runnaway

Orphan Runnaway

A door knocking

Mom: Come in.
Kid: Ms…you locked the door again!
Mom: I’ll be right there... (Walks over and opens the door)...How was your day?
Kid: It was really good! I got a 10 on my spelling….
Mom: (Interrupts) Sure, sure whatever! That’s good, that what you kids do these days!?... I wouldn’t know!
Kid: Yeah, we also went over to the fifth graders, they’re so cool!
Mom: One day you’ll be a fifth grader too, then you’ll be outta my hair for good, hopefully. Just go do your homework or something, get out-of my way! I have to make you dinner, don’t I?
Kid: fine... (Skips of stage.)

Mom: I don’t know what we’re gonna do with all these bills! There’s not enough money to pay for them all! If they cut off the electricity, then we won’t be able to watch Survivor! And, it’s not like Katy is gonna be able to go to college, anyway. Otherwise, who’s gonna keep house for me? (Pause) I’d like to see Katy try and cook for the rest of us…but ha she can’t take that kind of responsibility. She’s just…a spoiled little baby, who has to have everything done for HER! (Pause) Ha…but I’m smart enough to go get a microwave meal…so I don’t have to do much! (Yells up the ‘stairs’) Food’s ready so get your scrawny, little butt down here! I’m not gonna wait for you much longer!
Kid: Coming!
Mom: (Pause) what’s bloody taking so long!?
Kid: What happened to the TV?
Mom: What the hell did you do?
Kid: Nothing, I didn’t do anything! I just turned it off.
Mom: It wasn’t supposed to be on in the first place! Only I can touch the TV! He bought it for ME! (Walks offstage to see the TV)
Mom: (off stage) Oh my god! You blew up the TV! (On stage) Your father and I bought one thing for ourselves, and you ruined it! You’re so useless; I don’t know why your father brought you into this family! That was rather stupid of him bringing an immature child into our sophisticated relationship! You and that father of yours don’t do anything right! That bloody idiot didn’t even buy me anything for Valentine’s Day! (Phone rings) Speak of the devil… (sweetly) Hello! (Leaves stage)

Kid: I did do my homework…I don’t know what she’s talking about! Useless...? I’m not useless! Well, at least…I don’t think so…I always do my homework! And I help her with the dishes, and I do my chores and everything! I didn’t mean to ruin the T.V, it just sort of happened. She can’t really think that my dad is stupid! He’s a successful salesman! He told me so! And you can’t be a salesman if you’re stupid. Can you?! Well, SHE’S the only one that’s stupid in THIS house! Dad had lots of girlfriends before this one…but she’s by far the worst, and stupidest! She gave me peanut butter for lunch today, again. I hate peanut butter! She should know that by now! I mean she’s been here for like 6 month already! All of my dads other friends were nice to me, and cared about me and didn’t give me peanut butter. And they all cared about my grades too… she wouldn’t care if I didn’t do my home work, but I did, I did it earlier. (Shows her homework).





(Mom comes back onstage)
Mom:
Kid: I did my homework, before I watched TV, see?
Mom: (into phone) hold on sweetie! (Shakes her head then talks with loud whisper) never mind, fine, whatever! Come with me, we’re gonna go by another TV.
Kid: So… there’s nothing wrong?
Mom: Of course something’s wrong, you ruined the bloody TV! (Sarcastically)But…noooooo, you’re just a stupid little kid, who never does anything wrong, eh? Well, I need a TV so I’m gonna buy me a new one!
Kid: uh, okay Ms…..
Mom: It’s Ms. Kate, and it will be Mrs. Once your father brings out that shiny diamond ring!

Mom: (mom sweetly, talks to dad on cell phone) I know we can’t afford it… (Pause) but, I have to! Without out Survivor, I won’t survive! (Pauses…lets dad talk)…It’s okay, don’t worry, I’ll by a small one, just big enough to see the hot host!
Kid: I’m hot; can I have an ice cream Ms…..?
Mom: No! Can’t you see I’m on the phone? (Sighs, sweet talking to dad) Your lovely little daughter is costing us too much! (Pause) That little midget is taking up too much room, too much space, and too much money! (Pause) … No, I can’t do that; I can’t get a job…that’s absurd!
Kid: is that daddy? Can I talk to him?!
Mom: (To kid) NO, he’s talking to me! (To dad) You’ve got that little midget that I’ve got to watch…! (Stare at kid during pause) We’d both be better off without her! (Pause) We need to talk when you get home! (Hangs up).

Mom: (To Katy) Here’s a lollipop; it should keep you quiet for a while! I’m just gonna go get a new TV, so just wait right here in the park, keep yourself busy and I’ll be right back.
Kid: okay Ms. Kate, I’ll stay right here playing.
Mom: (Pats Katy on the head) Yeah, just don’t bother anyone; they don’t need your edginess! (Mom goes offstage)

(Blackout)
Kid: (sits down, crosses her legs and puts her head on the floor)... (Wakes up)…dad? Daddy? Daddy? DAD, where are you!? Dad? It’s dark out here! Daddy?! I’m cold! Daddy! Where are you!? Daddy...? Daddy? (Stands up and starts looking around, and wanders offstage).